Talk about Societal Pressures

Slaytor Jackston
3 min readJan 27, 2022

I am still not clear on what you meant about societal pressures. Can you explain more?

I apologize for not digging as deeply into the subject as I could have. The idea of the societal pressures was introduced in the Identifying My Wants and Needs post and was somewhat glossed over in the post about codependency. However, neither did a deep dive into the subject. For that, I apologize. But thank you for bringing this up.

Firstly, societal pressures are essentially expectations that influence an entire community or parts of it. Essentially, it is a broader version of peer pressure. Some examples of societal pressure within the United States are the pressure to get married and have children. Using these examples, getting married is incentivized, such as receiving additional financial or medical benefits. Not only is getting married incentivized, but it is also a part of the image of obtaining the American Dream; well, that and having the 2.5 children. As for the societal pressure for having children, at one point in time, it was shameful for a person to not want children. However, this is changing over time.

Societal pressures also influence how we behave in a relationship. Not all come from a family system that models healthy romantic partnerships. Because of this, people tend to imitate what they have observed from their family, learned from others, or seen in movies, television, or social media. Unfortunately, these portrayals do not often reflect reality or healthy relationships. Think about the expectation of who pays for the first date. Or the conversation of what a partner should bring to the relationship.

To illustrate this point, think of the traditional gender roles. The man is expected to be the provider for the family while the woman is expected to tend to the home life and the man’s sexual pleasure. These expectations remove the personal desires of those within the relationship and their desire for how they interact within the workforce or home; meaning, this perspective eliminates the individualized choices from the relationship. Not every man wants to be a provider. Not every woman wants to tend to home life. The same can be said for those who are gender fluid or transgender.

We all have different ways in which we want to interact within the confounds of our romantic relationships and long-term goals; however, many are focused on living the societal expectations rather than their own. For those who do not know what they want in a relationship and can only resonate with the expectations from outside forces, ask yourself the following questions and answer them in your personal journal.

  1. What does a healthy relationship look like for me?
  2. What do I expect from myself within a relationship?
  3. Am I ready to be in a relationship?
  4. What qualities and characteristics do I want in a partner outside of their physical attractiveness?

After answering these questions, look for the partner that suits your desires.

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